One-Act Play
Seeking more than sex.
Two strangers meet in the steam room of a gym in midtown Manhattan and embark on a cat-and-mouse game to confront each other's desires and try to expose their true identities.
LENGTH: 45 minutes. Also available in 30-, 20-, and 15-minute versions.
RATING: R-rated. Also available in a PG version for general audiences.
AVAILABLE FORMATS: Stage, radio, and Zoom.
CAST: 2M
SETTING
A steam room at a gym in midtown Manhattan.
TIME
One afternoon several years ago.
CHARACTERS
Jeff. Male. In his 30s. In reasonably good shape. Could be a businessman.
Kevin. Male. In his 30s. Muscular and attractive. Could be a model.
Watch it now!
A Zoom Reading of STEAM
Theatre Rhinoceros in San Francisco--the longest-running queer theatre in the world--presented a free Zoom Reading of STEAM, a one act play by William Ivor Fowkes, directed by Joe Tally, at 11PM Eastern (8PM Pacific), Saturday, April 18, 2020. It featured Bay Area actors Justin Lopez ("Jeff") and Nick Trengrove ("Kevin").
EXCERPT:
Scene: One afternoon in the steam room at a gym. The set consists of two steam room benches with a door between them. The door has a window.
SOUND: The hiss of steam.
JEFF sits on one of the benches—either wrapped in his towel or naked on top of his towel. He seems frustrated—waiting for something that isn’t happening. Looks around bored. Finally gets up. Looks out the door. Eventually sees someone coming. Sits back down quickly.
KEVIN enters, his towel wrapped tightly around his waist. He is muscular and very attractive. JEFF can’t help staring at him, but tries to be discreet. KEVIN sits on the other bench. He is self-involved and doesn’t even really notice JEFF—or at least doesn’t let on if he does. KEVIN closes his eyes. JEFF keeps sneaking glances at him.
JEFF coughs to get KEVIN’s attention. KEVIN opens his eyes long enough to see who coughed, then closes them again. JEFF clears his throat, but gets no response. He touches or massages himself—maybe trying to get KEVIN’s attention or maybe because he just can’t help himself. (He might rip his towel off and put it in a crumpled pile next to him.)
KEVIN opens his eyes long enough to notice JEFF, who quickly sits at attention. KEVIN smiles and closes his eyes again. JEFF gets up to look out the door window. Sits back down. Starts to touch or massage himself again—subtly—until KEVIN opens his eyes and watches him. After a few moments, KEVIN starts to touch or massage himself, too, while staring at JEFF.
JEFF
(to Kevin)
Oh, yeah . . . That’s good! . . . Keep that up! . . . Oh, yeah!
JEFF gets up. Approaches KEVIN.
KEVIN
Hey, hey—watch it! Whaddya doing? Get away from me!
JEFF sits back down.
JEFF
Sorry. Sorry . . . The heat got me all revved up . . . And I thought you . . .
KEVIN
That’s cool, but just stay on your own bench, please.
JEFF
Sorry. You’re a very hot-looking guy.
KEVIN
Thank you.
JEFF
I bet you hear that a lot.
KEVIN
Not really.
JEFF
But you are—really!
KEVIN
Yeah, I guess sometimes guys . . .
JEFF
I bet they do!
KEVIN
You’re not so bad yourself.
JEFF
Really?
KEVIN
Yes, really! And you must know that, too.
JEFF
Not really. I mean I hope I am. I’m never sure what guys . . . I mean—I don’t know.
They stare at each other. After a moment, KEVIN moans as he starts to touch or massage himself again.
KEVIN
Mm . . . mm . . .
JEFF
Oh, yeah . . . That’s good . . . Yeah, keep that up! . . . Can I join you now?
KEVIN
Okay. Just be careful!
JEFF leaps up. Joins KEVIN. They make out. Grab each other. Then KEVIN breaks things off.
KEVIN
Hey, watch it! I think someone’s coming!
JEFF
Oh, my god!
JEFF panics. Rushes back to his bench. Maybe drops his towel and scrambles to retrieve it.
KEVIN
Sorry—my mistake, but they threw someone out of the gym last week, so I just think we should be careful.
JEFF
No shit!
KEVIN
Yeah. Someone walked in and caught two guys doin’ it.
JEFF
Doin’ it? You mean all the way?
KEVIN
Well, doin’ something!
JEFF
Wow!
KEVIN
So, I just think we should be careful
JEFF
But I see stuff going on in here all the time. I thought they even encouraged it—part of their membership retention program or something.
KEVIN
Ha! But some guy complained, so they had to take action.
JEFF
But we don’t mind, do we? Do you mind?
KEVIN
Apparently the Board of Health minds.
JEFF
But why would anyone complain? I mean if a guy comes in here, he knows what to expect. It’s not like they need to put up a sign or anything.
KEVIN
It was some prissy little queen passing through town. I was out in the locker room and heard the whole thing. He starts screaming at the towel guy. “I can’t believe it! I just can’t believe it! I live in West Hollywood, and I’ve never seen anything like that in my whole life!” Can you imagine? Lives in West Hollywood—goes to the gym out there—and he’s never seen anything like that in his whole life? Does he wear a blindfold when he goes to the steam room?
JEFF
So, what happened?
KEVIN
The towel guy has to go get the manager, and the manager makes the guy show him who did it. So he looks around the locker room, and everyone’s staring into their locker pretending to be invisible, until he finally fingers one of them. Unbelievable! It was like the McCarthy witch trials right here in our little gym
JEFF
God, that’s horrible! Did they call the guy’s wife and tell her?
KEVIN
Whose wife?
JEFF
The guy they caught.
KEVIN
How do you know he’s got a wife?
JEFF
I just assume . . .
KEVIN
Why do you assume?
JEFF
I don’t know. It just seems . . . Never mind.
KEVIN
Oh, so you think only closeted married guys use the steam room?
JEFF
Uh, no. I didn’t mean . . .
They sit in silence.
KEVIN
So how long have you and your wife been married??
END OF EXCERPT