Full-Length Play

If that's all there is, my friend, then let's keep dancing. - Peggy Lee

Tommy Hamilton is looking for God, love, and sex--but not necessarily in that order. At the moment, however, he's in a coma, reviewing his life and wondering, "Is that all there is?" Spanning 30 years of gay history, this play examines the relationship between gay men and organized religion as well as the impact of the AIDS crisis.

THE SEEKER is based on the unpublished novel, THE NONBELIEVER by 

William Ivor Fowkes. 

Full script available at the National New Play Network's New Play Exchange (NPX). Click here.

Or see EXCERPT below.

You can also read the complete script (CLICK HERE) in

OPEN: Journal of Arts & Letters. 

LENGTH: 1 hour 50 minutes (plus intermission)

CAST: 6 actors (4M, 2F) playing 40 roles.  

For a larger cast, some of the cast doubling can be eliminated.

SETTING

Tommy Hamilton's mind, with stops in Ohio, New York City, Maine, and India.

TIME

1972-2000

MAIN CHARACTERS

Tommy Hamilton. Male. Starts at age 19, ends in his late 40s. From Cleveland Heights, OH. College student. Bookshop manager. Advertising executive. Seeker. 

Christian Barrie. Male. Starts at age 19, ends in his late 40s. From South Carolina. Troubled and naive. Juggling his sexual identity and religious needs.

Molly McCormack. Female. Starts in her 30s, ends in her 40s. Copywriter. Sincere and goofy. Follows a guru in India.

Pastor Dave. Male. Early 30s. Charismatic minister trying to relate to college kids. 

Master (Guru Singh). Male.60s. Gentle and charismatic. 

Aunt Mildred. Female. 70s. Tommy's great aunt. Owner of Book World in Boothbay Harbor, ME.

Comic. Male. Any age. Catskills-style comedian.

Patrick. Male. 30s/40s. Tommy's later-in-life partner. 

+ 24 other speaking parts, 5 off-stage voices and 3 non-speaking parts.

PUBLICATION

2023: Published in OPEN: Journal of Arts & Letters, an online journal (CLICK HERE).

READING

2014: Unitarian Universalist Congregation at Shelter Rock, Manhasset, NY.

HONORS 

2015: SEMI-FINALIST, Promising Playwright Award, Colonial Players, Annapolis, MD.

2015: SEMI-FINALIST, Princess Grace Playwriting Award.

EXCERPT:

ACT ONE

PART ONE: CHRISTIAN TRIANGLES

A white hospital curtain forms a backdrop across the stage. Lights come up slowly. TOMMY HAMILTON enters breathless and wearing running clothes. 

TOMMY

Hey, don’t shove me! 

(checking his pockets urgently). 

Where’s my inhaler?!

(calling out)

Hey! Where’s my inhaler?!

TOMMY looks around.

TOMMY (CONT’D)

Where am I? Patrick—are you here? Patrick! Hey, what’s going on? 

(hopefully)

Wait—have you arranged a surprise party for me?

Drum roll and cymbal crash. Spotlight up. A Borscht Belt COMIC enters holding a microphone.    

COMIC

Ladies and germs! Have we got a fantastic show for you tonight! But first—have you heard the one about the Plotnick diamond? Ya see, on a flight to Miami, this woman admires the ring on the lady sitting next to her and says, “Excuse the intrusion, but I can’t help admiring your ring. That diamond is so lovely!” “Thank you. It’s the Plotnick Diamond, you know.” “It has a name? How wonderful!” “But it comes with a curse.” “A curse? How romantic!” “Believe me, it’s not romantic! It’s horrible!” “What’s the curse?”

TOMMY

Mister Plotnick?

SOUND: Rim shot.

COMIC

Damn—you’ve heard it! 

The COMIC exits pulling the hospital curtain off with him, revealing a hospital bed occupied by a sleeping patient. The patient is hooked up to a mechanical respirator with its tube in the patient’s mouth, an intravenous feeding tube, and a catheter. 

TOMMY

I don’t get it. Is this part of the show?

TOMMY inspects the patient and then addresses the audience, as if talking to the patient.

TOMMY (CONT’D)

Are you all right? That’s an awful lot of equipment—what are you? Frankenstein’s monster? Sorry—bad joke. You look very familiar. Do I know you? Sorry—I didn’t catch that. Hello? That’s okay—you don’t have to talk. So, what are we supposed to do until Patrick and the others arrive? 

(beat)

Hey, why don’t I tell you a story? It starts in Cleveland Heights, Ohio, where I drive my parents nuts by asking too many questions all the time.  

Lights up on MR. HAMILTON reading a newspaper. 

MR. HAMILTON

(responding to a question)

Because if you don’t mow the lawn, Tommy, it will become wild.

(responding to another question)

Because the neighbors won’t be happy. 

(and so on)

Because we have to get along with our neighbors. 

(and so on)

Because no man is an island. 

(snapping)

Fine—go live on an island!

Lights down on MR. HAMILTON. Lights up on MRS. HAMILTON whisking something in a bowl. 

MRS. HAMILTON

(responding to a question)

Because your vegetables are good for you.

(responding to another question)

Because they have important nutrients in them. 

(and so on)

I don’t know what nutrients are. I just know you have to eat them to live. 

(and so on)

Why should you live? What kind of a question is that?

(more urgently)

And don’t forget your inhaler!

Lights down on MRS. HAMILTON. 

TOMMY

So, what’s my problem? Well, for one thing, my asthma always makes me self-conscious and nervous. At any moment, I could break out into a coughing fit so bad I’ll . . . well, I don’t even want to go there. I’m also anxious about—well, everything! What if gravity suddenly gives out, and we all float up to the sun and get burned alive? What’s gonna happen when we die? Oh, and the big one—what should I do with my life if I don’t know why I’m here in the first place? I think they have drugs for all this now, but back in my day, I’m on my own. So, when I head off to college, I know exactly what I want to do.

Lights up on MR. HAMILTON.

MR. HAMILTON

I didn’t say you can’t major in philosophy, Tommy. I just said you should think twice about it. All those questions with no answers. Where’s that going to get you? 

(responding)

Yes, I realize that’s a question with no answer, too.

Lights up on MRS. HAMILTON.

MRS. HAMILTON

Listen to your father, honey. The Beekmans’ son majored in philosophy, and now he refuses to get out of bed.

Lights down on MR. & MRS. HAMILTON and the patient. TOMMY pulls a hospital curtain revealing PROFESSOR ROSENSTEIN.        

[PROJECTION: a view of Columbia University]

PROFESSOR ROSENSTEIN

All right, men of Columbia—and ladies from Barnard—focus on this painting. 

A painting of a green triangle is lowered into view. 

PROFESSOR ROSENSTEIN (CONT’D)

(responding to a question from the class) 

No—I’m not going to hypnotize you. 

(dramatically)

I’m going to blow your mind! Tell me—where do triangles exist? 

(waiting for an answer)

No one? Careful—it’s a trick question. This painted green object isn’t really a triangle at all, is it? Triangles are nothing more than three-sided geometrical figures. As such, they don’t exist in space. Only triangularly shaped objects do. Now tell me—when do you think triangles first came into being? Careful—it’s another trick question.

(waiting for an answer)

No one?    

(staring disapprovingly at the class)

Oh, I hope you don’t think they were invented by human beings.  

TOMMY pulls the hospital curtain back across the stage covering up PROFESSOR ROSENSTEIN.  

[PROJECTION OFF]

TOMMY

Professor Rosenstein is right—he does blow my mind. We humans didn’t invent triangles! We discovered them, because they’d always been there, just as they’ll always be there when we’re long gone. And if triangles exist beyond earthly time and space—if they ‘re eternal—then so are all mathematical concepts. Think about that! That means an eternal realm might really exist—and it might contain all sorts of other wonderful things. And I bet there’s no asthma out there! I don’t know—but this all seems a lot more exciting and meaningful than anything they ever talk about at my family’s church back in Ohio.

TOMMY pulls the curtain offstage, revealing a pulpit. 

TOMMY (CONT’D)

(sermonizing at the pulpit)

Good morning, people! Thanks for inviting me to participate in College Youth Sunday, but the only reason I’ve come is to tell you all to go home! I know you have questions—I  have questions—believe me, I have questions—but this is the wrong place to address them. Guys, do you think these boring services and rituals accomplish anything? 

TOMMY starts to heave and cough. Uses his inhaler. Calms down.

TOMMY (CONT’D)

(catching his breath)

I’m fine . . . I’m fine . . . So . . . So, let’s all just leave this church. Let’s go sit in a field somewhere—believers in God, believers in Buddha or triangles or nothing at all—and just talk. Amen and peace! 

TOMMY exits pushing the podium offstage. 

Lights up on MR. HAMILTON.

MR. HAMILTON

It’s easy to mock religion, Tommy, but where will that leave you when you’re lying there on your deathbed? Have you thought about that? 

Cross fade to MRS. HAMILTON.

MRS. HAMILTON

I think you embarrassed your father. And judging by that asthmatic attack, I don’t think God was too pleased either. 

Cross fade to MR. HAMILTON.

MR. HAMILTON

Have you asked yourself . . .? Wait— 

(grabbing his chest)

Good God! What’s happening?

MR. HAMILTON slumps over in his chair. Tommy rushes back on stage.

TOMMY

Dad!

Cross fade to MRS. HAMILTON wearing a black shroud.

MRS. HAMILTON

It’s not your fault, Tommy. The doctor said he’d never seen such a massive coronary. There’s nothing any of us could have done. At least he didn’t suffer. 

VOICE #1

I’m so sorry for your loss.

MRS. HAMILTON

At least he didn’t—Funny . . . I feel a little . . . I think I need to sit down.

TOMMY gets his mother a chair.

TOMMY

Here you go, Mother.

MRS. HAMILTON sits down. Slumps in the chair. Has a few spasms. Collapses completely.

TOMMY (CONT’D)

Mother!

TOMMY shakes his mother. She is dead.

VOICE #1

I’m so sorry for your loss.

Cross fade to the patient.  

TOMMY

(shell-shocked) 

My parents aren’t even 50 years old, and I’m suddenly an orphan. What is the universe trying to tell me?

(to the patient)

How old are you, by the way? Oh, I don’t mean to suggest you’re going to die anytime soon. Excuse me a moment.

TOMMY approaches the audience. 

TOMMY (CONT’D)

(quietly and conspiratorially)

To be honest—the way he looks—I’m not sure he’ll even make it through the night.  

Lights down on the patient. 

TOMMY (CONT’D)

Poor guy. But maybe we’re all in the same boat, all of us liable to die any minute now. No, wait—not me! I’m in the middle of my story. I’ve still got plenty of time left—I mean in my story. But in my story, my parents’ death knocks the wind out of me. And my asthma doesn’t help—no pun intended. I really could die any minute. So, I decide I better focus on what really matters in life and screw the rest. But how do we know what matters? 

(calling out)

Hey, can someone tell me what matters in this life? Help me out here!

The word “GOD” appears. 

TOMMY (CONT’D)

God? Seriously? I was hoping I could stop thinking about that. I don’t even know if “God” exists! 

The word “LOVE” appears. 

TOMMY (CONT’D)

Love? Okay, that’s better! We’re born alone. We die alone. In between, we need connection. Please! Let there be love in my life! 

The word “SEX” appears. 

TOMMY (CONT’D)

Sex? Yes! There will be sex in this story! I hope that makes you happy. It makes me happy.

(beat)

So, after my parents die, I go back to Columbia, where I take a philosophy class that changes my life. It’s a course on phenomenology. You know what that is, right? No? Maybe I better explain. 

A phone rings. 

TOMMY (CONT’D)

Oh, excuse me.

“GOD,” “LOVE,” and “SEX” disappear.

AUNT MILDRED enters. (AUNT MILDRED, in her 70s, is all dolled up, complete with a beauty shop hairdo.)

AUNT MILDRED

(in her Maine accent)

Tommy, de-uh. It’s your Aunt Mildred. Ah’ve been worried about yuh. You’re all alone in the world now. And goin’ right back to college—that can’t’ve been easy. So, ah think yuh need a change of scenery. How about comin’ up to Maine for the summa.”

TOMMY

(on the phone)

Oh, I wouldn’t want to impose.

AUNT MILDRED

Yuh won’t be imposin’. I intend to put yuh to work! I want yuh to help run ma bookshop in Boothbay Hahbuh [Harbor]. AY-yuh, there’s no remedy for grief like good hard work. Promise me yuh’ll think about it!

TOMMY

I will. Hey, do you know what time it is?

AUNT MILDRED checks her watch.

AUNT MILDRED

1972.

TOMMY

(to the audience)

I told you—plenty of time! 

AUNT MILDRED exits. 

TOMMY (CONT’D)

Turns out Aunt Mildred’s right. Working in her bookshop helps. But I’m still sad and lonely a lot of the time—until one afternoon. Oh, in case you don’t know—I’m gay. I know that’s no big deal, but in those days, it’s still categorized as a mental disorder by the American Psychiatric Association. But I don’t let that stop me.

[PROJECTION: The interior of Book World, a bookstore.]

TOMMY rolls a bookrack onstage. CHRISTIAN enters.

TOMMY (CONT’D)

May I help you?

CHRISTIAN

(in his southern accent)

You’ve got an awful lot of books on philosophy.

(holding up a book)

Have you read this one?

TOMMY

Don’t bother—it’s insipid!

(handing him a book)

Try this one—The Phenomenology of Christianity.

CHRISTIAN

(disdainfully)

I’ve heard this one’s insipid, too.

TOMMY

Are you kidding? It’s far out! He’s a groovy writer! 

(grabbing the book away)

Oh, wait—you’re making fun of me.

CHRISTIAN

(grabbing the book back) 

No, no, kind Bookshop Proprietor. I shall take your recommendation seriously. 

(studying the book) 

I like books about Christianity. I’m a practicin’ Christian, ya know.

TOMMY

So am I—sort of.

CHRISTIAN

“Sort of”? But I don’t know about this big word—

(struggling)

“phenomen—phenomeno—ology”?  

TOMMY

It’s mind-blowing, man!

CHRISTIAN

We don’t like to blow minds in South Carolina.

TOMMY

Well, we do at Columbia University. 

CHRISTIAN

I get the picture.

TOMMY

(provocatively)

Do you?

TOMMY and CHRISTIAN stare at each other for an awkward moment.

CHRISTIAN

Uh . . . maybe I don’t. 

(nervously changing subjects)

So, tell me about this mind-blowing book.

TOMMY

Well, you’ve heard of phenomenology, right? 

CHRISTIAN

Heard of it? I can’t even pronounce it.

TOMMY

(getting excited—speaking rapidly)

It’s a kind of philosophy. It tries to describe human experience without considering the validity or invalidity of our underlying beliefs. 

CHRISTIAN

Slow down, Yankee! 

TOMMY

You see, I used to have all these questions about God and the meaning of life and all that, and they used to drive me crazy or depress me or I don’t know what, but then my parents died—

CHRISTIAN

Oh, I’m sorry.

TOMMY

I looked at their lives: Dad went to work. Mom cooked dinner. And then they died. So, what was the point? But thanks to phenomenology, I realized I could just push all the questions aside. I could focus on the world around me instead and see everything more clearly. So, I’m not looking for God anymore. Or anything. I’m just looking and enjoying being in awe. 

CHRISTIAN

I don’t get it, but I’d like to hear more sometime.   

TOMMY

(announcing) 

Ladies and Gentlemen, Book World is now closed! We’ll re-open after dinner! 

[PROJECTION OFF]

TOMMY (CONT’D)

(grabbing Tommy’s arm)

Okay—let’s go!

CHRISTIAN

Wait—we haven’t even been introduced!

TOMMY

I’m sorry. I’m Tommy Hamilton. And who might you be?

CHRISTIAN

I might be Jonas Salk, but I happen to be Christian Barrie.

TOMMY

Cool! Now, let’s go! I’ve only got an hour off. 

“SEX” appears.

CHRISTIAN

Where are we going?

TOMMY

Back to my place, of course. Or where are you staying?

CHRISTIAN

Out on Barters Island. 

TOMMY

That’s thirty minutes away—so it’s got to be my place. Let’s go, man!

CHRISTIAN

What are we gonna do?

TOMMY

We’re gonna—you know—

CHRISTIAN

I don’t know. 

TOMMY

Are you playing hard to get?

“SEX” disappears quickly—or is yanked away.

TOMMY (CONT’D

(seeing Christian’s confusion—soberly)

Uh-oh. I’m sorry—I think I just jumped to a conclusion.

CHRISTIAN

What did you want to do?

TOMMY

Forget it.  

(brightening at an idea) 

Or, hey—how about a picnic on the rocks out at Ocean Point?

CHRISTIAN

My fate is in your hands, Yankee!

CHRISTIAN pulls the hospital curtain across the stage. The word “LOVE” appears.

MRS. HAMILTON enters.

MRS. HAMILTON

Tommy, life is so fleeting—and precious. You’ve got asthma. We had weak hearts. You’ve got our genes. Think about all that. Don’t waste your life.

TOMMY

What are you saying?

MRS. HAMILTON

All this philosophy you keep reading—it’s fine, but you have to have love in your life, too. Like what your father and I had.

TOMMY

But, Mother, you know how I am, don’t you?

MRS. HAMILTON

I had my suspicions. But you can still find love.

TOMMY

Are you saying Christian might be the one?

MRS. HAMILTON

Oh, excuse me, dear, your father’s calling. 

(exiting)

And don’t forget your inhaler! 

MRS. HAMILTON exits. 

“LOVE” disappears.

 TOMMY pulls the curtain, revealing CHRISTIAN.  

[PROJECTION: the coast of Maine.]

TOMMY re-enters. Sits with CHRISTIAN. They eat sandwiches and look out to sea.  

CHRISTIAN

You realize we’ll never get back in time. Will you get in trouble?

TOMMY

I need a friend more than a job.

(looking at Christian)

You’re cute, you know.

CHRISTIAN

(uncomfortably)

Why are you staring at me? 

TOMMY

I’m sorry. I just thought—Hey, look at that view! Isn’t it incredible?

CHRISTIAN

It’s very nice.

TOMMY

Is that all you can say?

CHRISTIAN

It’s magnificent! Okay? Now what about that book? What did you mean--you’re not looking for God; you’re just in “awe”?

TOMMY

Well, like this whole scene out here. Those sea gulls swooping back and forth. The bells clanging. The sea surging. Who cares if all this serves some purpose? I mean isn’t it possible to take it all in and just, you know, marvel at it, man?  

CHRISTIAN

Do Columbia students smoke a lot of pot? I’ve never indulged. You’re forgetting that what we’re witnessing is God’s work. If there’s anything to marvel at, it’s God. Didn’t you say you were a Christian—“sort of”?

TOMMY

Well, I was raised Episcopalian.

CHRISTIAN

That explains it! Those traditional Protestant denominations are just breeding grounds for atheists and agnostics.

TOMMY

Have you always been so intense?

CHRISTIAN

One day I prayed to Jesus to make my momma and daddy stop fighting—and they did. So, now I owe Him everything.

TOMMY

And you think Jesus doesn’t want you to get close to me?

CHRISTIAN

I better explain. I’m staying at a Christian retreat for the summer. Back home I go to a

Christian men’s college. Only the most devout students get invited up here. And we’ve all taken a vow of chastity—so it’s “ixnay” on the “exsay.” No sex. So, I haven’t been ignoring your advances—I’m not blind, and you’re not very subtle.

TOMMY

Your retreat sounds like a prison. 

CHRISTIAN

It’s a sanctuary from all the temptations to turn away from God. Ya see, I think He sent you as a test—so I’d appreciate it if you’d help me pass. Will you do that for me, Tommy?

TOMMY

(sadly)

Funny how your passing means my failing. 

[PROJECTION: The interior of a bookstore.]

CHRISTIAN

I thought this place would never clear out!

TOMMY

What are you doing in town so late? If your cult finds you in this den of sin, won’t they lock you up?

CHRISTIAN

Let me buy you a soda. We’re not allowed to drink, by the way.

TOMMY

I’m busy.

CHRISTIAN

You want me to leave?

TOMMY

Or you can watch me close up if that’s your idea of a good time. 

TOMMY starts to heave and cough. Takes out his inhaler. Calms down.

CHRISTIAN

Are you all right?

TOMMY

(catching his breath)

I’m fine . . . I’m fine . . . It’s just asthma. Now, what did you want?

CHRISTIAN

After plying you with root beer, I was gonna ask you to drive me to Retreat House. I don’t have any way to get back there.

TOMMY

Spend the night with me at Aunt Mildred’s. I’ll sneak you in. 

CHRISTIAN

Tommy, I told you about temptation. Ask yourself—what would Jesus do in this situation?

[PROJECTION off.]

TOMMY and CHRISTIAN sit on two chairs as if in a car. TOMMY drives.     

CHRISTIAN (CONT’D)

That’s Retreat House down there. Do me a favor. Turn off the lights. Now turn off the motor. 

TOMMY and CHRISTIAN stare at the scenery.

TOMMY

I had no idea it was so beautiful out here!

CHRISTIAN

Shhh! Let’s just take it all in for a moment.

TOMMY

(mocking)

Don’t you mean we should marvel at God’s work?

CHRISTIAN

Just shush! 

CHRISTIAN turns slowly. Stares at TOMMY intensely. 

CHRISTIAN (CONT’D)

God, give me strength! 

“SEX” appears. 

CHRISTIAN grabs TOMMY’s face. Kisses him long and hard, then sits upright like it never happened.

CHRISTIAN (CONT’D)

No, I’ll be strong! I want you to respect me. I want the Lord to respect me. And I want to respect myself. Will you help me do that, Tommy?

TOMMY

Kiss me! I promise I’ll still respect you!

CHRISTIAN

(seeing something in the distance) 

Oh, shit! It’s Pastor Dave!

“SEX” disappears quickly. CHRISTIAN jumps out of the car as PASTOR DAVE enters. (PASTOR DAVE sports a beard, bell-bottom jeans, T-shirt, and strings of beads.)

END OF EXCERPT